Reverb12: Moment

(For the past two years, I’ve used Reverb10 prompts to give myself a question to answer every day of December. It’s a great way to reflect on the year and set goals for the future. I’ve kept my favorite prompts, added a few from other sources, and created my own month of questions.)

Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail.

I have no idea what possessed me, but this summer I had an urge to run. It was bizarre, and a bit scary. I have not run since I was in Junior High and injured my knee. Since then I have had a host of other medical issues that I had thought meant I’d never run again. I thought that little girl who loved to run and was the fastest kid in the class several years in a row was all locked up in the past. But I was wrong.

I started in secret, not even telling my husband. Then I did tell him, but made a rule that he could never bring it up. It was too much pressure. We did not talk about running. And yet I craved his advice. He runs every week, and has done half marathons. He loves running, and I wanted to know how to get to that place.

I started really, really slowly. At first I could not even run for a full 60 seconds without being out of breath, giving myself a huge pounding headache, and having chest pains the next day. Even just 60 seconds was pushing the limits of my body.

I am really surprised I didn’t give up. It’s the kind of thing I normally give up on. And yet, soon I was running around the track at the local school 4 times – a mile – without stopping. It was an amazing moment. A giant f-you to all those self-imposed limitations. I hope I remember it forever.

I can honestly say I don’t understand how I got to that point. Where did that level of motivation and dedication come from? Now, I have started to work on a Couch to 5K program, and have a secret goal of running in a Mardi Gras 5 K race. Anything is possible.

PS. Last year I wrote this.

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